Get over it.
No truer words were ever spoken. Maybe. And yet, they can be the harshest, most daunting directive. It’s one thing for a loved one, a therapist, a guru, etc., to assist in working through a difficult situation in life. But when someone flings the words, “Get over it!” at me while I’m putting part of my life back together, I realize they have no idea what I’m doing or what it means to me. Or I’m dragging my feet, but lets not focus on that personal peccadillo shall we? The words “Get Over It” make the idea of moving through difficult times sound like brushing lint off one’s lapels. It is so rarely that simple, that unemotional, that . . . fast.
Not to say that things have to be as hard as we make them, but downplaying how someone feels about emerging from their cocoon, into that so called butterfly, isn’t always as easy and glamorous as it sounds. I love the imagery of a butterfly breaking out of the cocoon, and dazzling the world as it flies off. But between spinning that cocoon, and breaking out of it as a different creature, a deconstruction has to take place.
Roll that word ‘deconstruction’ around in your mouth and head for awhile. Imagine a house being deconstructed, piece by piece. Everything from decorations and furniture down to flooring, fixtures and framing… all the way down to the foundation. Remodeling is messy and rarely finishes on schedule.
I know I can’t change the way the world uses words, but if you are going through your own deconstruction and rebuilding phase, don’t let the flippant use of the term “Get Over It” hurt you, or hold you back. Maybe this person in your life is impatient for you to feel better, maybe what you’re sorting through pushes one of their own buttons. Either way, that is for them to sort out. You’re on your own mission. Cue up the theme song to the Six Million Dollar Man. Maybe they want you back as you used to be, but gosh darn it, you’re busy stretching a new set of wings. Butterflies do that. They’ll have to get over it.