I see a lot of tweets, and hear people out in real life, commenting on what another person is wearing. It’s usually not the nicest thing, even if it’s couched, as friendly advice. Often the words, “I’m just saying” Or, “I’m sorry but, …” are in there somewhere. Where’s the love? If you are satisfied with yourself, truly, then what other people look like, and wear, doesn’t matter to you. No matter how unusual or unflattering you find someone’s outfit; how you think of them, or what you remark about them, says more about you than you realize. “I’m so afraid of being judged, I’d never have the courage to wear whatever I wanted.” Is that what you mean to tell the rest of us, when you lean into the nearest stranger and sneer, “Oh my god did you see that hair?”
Some random acts of kindness you might have heard of, people paying the toll for the car behind them, or for the cup of coffee the next guy orders. Try this one, when you see someone wearing something you find unacceptable for whatever reason, stop and ask yourself why. And no turning it back to the stranger, sputtering indignantly about tube tops and the lack of bras, look only at yourself and ask, “Why am I so upset, repulsed, angry?” It’s only life. What did you wear in your youth? What weren’t you allowed to wear? Giving yourself a moment of clarity and kindness might bring you to passing on the favor. How insanely boring would it be if our inner fashion police ruled the world? Exactly, zzzzzzzzzzz.
See people and focus on something beautiful about them, their eyes, the brightness of their outfit, their poise, the smile they freely give to others, . . . their courage to wear what they want. And just for a moment, allow yourself to imagine an outfit you’ve always wanted to wear, and forget what you’ve been told about matching, appropriate-ness, fashionable, body type, all of that. Give yourself the time to smile at the idea of being free to express yourself, without anyone judging you. Feels good doesn’t it?